Politics: Christine over at Red Lipstick Diaries has been waiting anxiously for me to post something meaty post-election. And while I have strong opinions and could do just that, I have kept true to my word and not blogged about something for which I had no edifying language to publish. Now that the dust has settled and the Obamas have had their first meeting with the Bushes, here's what I have to say:
Just as Christine herself said on Facebook, it's time to be the united states and time to cease being either the red or blue states. An administration can only be successful if every single person is doing their part. So we deal with the next four years shoulder to shoulder with every other American, regardless of their voting preference. If we want to be perceived as a strong, vital nation, we have to actually be one. That will be harder for some (read: me) than others, but I truly believe that's what has to happen.
Religion: See posted picture above. Really, my religion and politics opinions could all go in one big section. In both areas, it's impractical to be a purist in whichever school of thought you fall under. Contrary to popular belief, extremism is a frightening concept to me. I think there are ways in both these areas to focus on the things that we have in common and emphasize on those, rather than spend our time having conversations where no one is truly being heard. There are certain areas where people are going to disagree, and it doesn't necessarily mean that either side is not truly Christian. Just means they're different. For example, what I'm reading right now for Lay Ministry about leading worship really brings this into light for planning worship services. I'd love to explain all of the amazing things I'm learning, but I'm afraid there would be an explosion of grey matter all over the computer screen. Just too much to boil it all down.
Role of Women in the Church: I'm writing a paper about this and must admit I approached this topic with an anti-Paul sway based on what I, at the time, believed to be godly teaching. I think, if I could boil this one down to a statement, is that Jesus personally commanded each one of us to love one another. I believe that where we started having "issues" or "problems" is where our sinful human element took over and started trying to figure things out or get things organized. Do we as humans need structure and organization? Basically, yes. Do groups get priority in the pecking order? Eventually. Did God intend this? Well, dear Readers, I believe my answer to that is now no. (Ducks for cover before the tomatoes pop me upside the head...) Honestly, I really don't know that we can say for sure. I can already hear arguments on both sides and see validity to them both. I don't see this question ever being answered to anyone's satisfaction this side of Paradise, guys.
Obama's Pre-Presidential Activities: Barack and Michelle met with George and Laura this morning at Quarters 1 to kinda "get the inside scoop." Apparently the women went off to do things like talk about how irritating it is when the guys drink beer, scratch themselves, fart, and watch football or something, whilst the menfolk had a history-making hoedown in the Oval Office. Seriously, folks, do you KNOW how many eggs I would've sold to have been a fly on THAT wall! No media were allowed to follow into the OO, and no aides were on hand, either. The words that were exchanged in that room are known only to them and to God. I can't even know whether to faint from terror or to faint from excitement.
One last point before I leave the topic of politics but under the "Obama" tag. I read an AP story and heard repeated on the news that the "Obama team" is reviewing the record of Bush's executive orders. According to the AP, one of the first things our President-Elect wants to do is reverse every one of Bush's EOs to try and undo all of the legislative marks GW has left on America. All I can say is: America, hold onto yer butts. It's gonna be an interesting ride...
Parenting: Having some significant issues these days with Bud. Not end-of-the-world, kicking-him-out-of-school issues, but ones that I just don't know how to handle. I feel completely inept to handle this, and I realize that parenting is mainly learn as you go kind of stuff and trusting God to give you guidance along the way. The BLUF here is that I see in Bud many of my characteristics. Many of my not-s0-good characteristics. I know which road they led me down at one point, and it grieves my spirit to think of that being in his future. I'm fervently praying that God will help his teachers and me to flip a switch in that little round head of his before he grows up to be an out of control teenager in a mean, viscious world. Or at least let me be dead before he ruins his life. (Just a joke, guys.) :)
Grief/Loss/That Whole Drama: Things have really been piling up here. I think, in particular, needing T. around to help me parent a son has been weighing heavily on me. To make it worse, I have had dreams so vivid I can still feel the softness of his lips or hear his mellow voice as I wake in the morning, and my reality comes crashing back down on me like an Acme anvil. With R. being there for me emotionally but not around physically to spend time with me or just take care of me, let me curl up in the crook of his strong shoulder and just weep, I have felt as though I would burst. 11/30 is just under three weeks away, and I'm already dreading it. Funny, it affects me differently every year. While the happiness and love in my relationship with R. is proof-positive that things in my life are moving on in a promising direction, the struggles of being a single parent, and how I became a single parent, really rain on that parade. I've read and re-read scripture about this, and it's not that I don't take comfort in that. It's just that scripture and God don't replace my loss. Plain and simple. Some days I just need to be sad without religion and salvation getting mixed in. While memories bring joy somedays, they feel like Chinese water torture on other days. November's just a hard month.
Looking for something positive? Well, that depends on your description of that. I've been accused of being a chronically negative person. OK. What's yer point?!? No really, I just have a very different way of seeing things. I see beauty in suffering, growth in change and painful times, and realize I must give my children up each day to God. I can't swing from the rafters with a smile on my face like some people. My way of being positive is to continue walking in the soupy fog, knowing that God will always provide a path for me to go down. And that's really enough for me.
6 comments:
> I think there are ways in both these areas to focus on the things that we have in common and emphasize on those, rather than spend our time having conversations where no one is truly being heard.
You took the words right out of my mouth. Amen.
Hugs for all the rest too. Sometimes life gets a bit overwhelming.
You said some beautiful things here. What an encouragement to those who just can't hear "what , you wouldn't be feeling sad if you trusted God more!" one more time! I am thankful that God is with you, even in a tough month like November.
Amen! While I love a good ol' GGG rant, sometimes it's best just to stick with simplicity. I'm sure this admin will leave you plenty of things to rant about. I know November is a tough month for you and T-giving is your favorite holiday. May you be surrounded by the comfort of family and friends. Missing you...
Very well said - all of it. I wanted to play devil's advocate, but I can't find anything to disagree about.
Your "Grief" paragraph makes me ache for you. Partly because I have the tiniest, most miniscule understanding of how you feel and that hurt me like a ton of bricks. But mostly because I know the pain for you is magnified a hundredfold.
You bless me.
LOL on what Laura and Michelle were talking about! Though I wonder if she wasn't also showing Michelle what remains of the collection of Presidential china after Billary and their aids had a field day breaking a bunch of it (thumbing their noses at the country) on their way out of the White House prior to George and Laura moving in. GRRRR. Still burns me up thinking about that.
I know it's not anywhere near the same as what you've been through, but this past couple of years I have lost several people dear to me, and have tasted much of what it means to walk through the valley of the shadow of death, both myself and with the loved ones of those who have died. One thing I've noticed is that there is no set time limit for grief. There is no rush...no race to get through it. You just take as much time as you need. Sometimes you need to embrace the loss, sometimes vent about it, sometimes go weeks without thinking about it too much, sometimes weep, sometimes remember things with gratefulness to the Lord, and sometimes smile from the poignancy of the memories. Sometimes you have to talk about it, or just think on it awhile. Sometimes it just hits you at strange, unexpected moments. Eventually, it gets easier.
It's an honor to your husband's memory that you loved him as you did and he you, and that you remember him still, and that the relationship was so good that it's something you'd want again in your life.
It's also an honor to the new man in your life...that he is the caliber of man that could, through patience, understanding and love, bring that part of your heart out of hibernation...and that your heart has responded and opened, making room for love to bloom again.
Moving on doesn't necessarily mean severing what was, but instead making room for new growth. There will always be a part of you that is because of what was with him.
Hugs and prayers that the Lord will comfort you in those difficult moments.
I'm so sorry that this is such a hard month for you, GGG. We know that Jesus wept. Because he felt what we feel. And He didn't apologize for not being Polly Anna to my knowledge. I don't think it odd at all that you continue to grieve and process T's death. You have living reminders of him every single day in your children. Peace and grace to you, my friend.
Post a Comment