I'm a Girl Who's Been Around the Block...

Between living the military lifestyle, PCSing (that's Permanent Change of Station for you civilians out there), visiting friends and family, and taking off for pure adventure, apparently I've been a few places. I just love these maps! They really help me to see what a variety of places I've gotten to go and how blessed I am to have had the opportunities to venture out and experience all sorts of God's creations... Enjoy!



create your own personalized map of the USA

As if that weren't enough...



create your own visited country map
or check our Venice travel guide

I need to work on making more of this last map red!!

Maria Chapman

What a beautiful family. My heart literally explodes in black, foul grief when I think of the little face that won't be in the next family picture that Steven Curtis Chapman and his family take. The little girl sitting in his lap, Maria, just turned 5 years old less than 10 days ago. And now she is gone.

HOWEVER! Victory over the grave is still given to those with the name of Jesus on their lips. Praise our Almighty God for this provision that makes times like these not crush us with their pain and magnitude.

If you click on the title of this blog, you will be redirected to SCC's website that gives information. But the best part of this site is the page where you get to "meet" Maria. What a darling little girl! I have several friends who have adopted "China girls," as they have decided to be called. I wonder about Maria's birthmother, what she went through as she went through her pregnancy and delivery, and finally the last time she laid eyes on her beautiful baby girl. One of my friends whose daughter is Chinese said that there are "drop off stations," unofficial places where the orphanages know to check constantly where moms leave these babies. We won't even talk here about orphanages. How amazing is it, though, in God's plan, that He chose for this little girl to not fall through the cracks of a governmental system, but to end up in America with a family that loved and cherished her! Think, again, how many women in our own country have children that they never wanted to begin with, have many kids they treat terribly, and then those whose arms ache for children but can't even conceive one.

I wonder what went through SCC and his wife's minds as they held her for the first time, all of the "firsts" that come and go so quickly that we barely get them documented in their baby books before high school graduation. I wonder what each of their other kids thought as Maria became one of the family and what their dearest memories will be of her.

And even though I've been through deep personal loss, I do wonder what raw emotions they are going through right now. Just because one person has lost a spouse, parent, child, etc., doesn't mean that they have the FOGGIEST idea of what another person experiences in crisis. Just in case you're ever wondering what to say in moments like that, let me tell you that less is more. Just a physical presence, and even silence, can be more comforting than a well-chosen thought or Bible verse.

I can't think of any better way to end this blog than in SCC's words in the song, "Cinderella." I think of how close Lil' G and T. were and how R. fits into the future picture every time I hear this song. I also remind myself to live in the moment more with my children.

I give you, "Cinderella."

The Open-Toed Shoe Pledge

Alright ladies, it's that time of year once again!!! I think we need to be reminded of a few basic shoe fashion rules. So my sisters, PLEASE, raise your big toes and repeat after me below....

As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the following rules when wearing sandals and other open-toe shoes:

1) I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. The sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.

2) I will either go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.

3) I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.

4) I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

5) I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.

6) If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.

7) I will not live in corn denial; rather, I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholl if my feet need him.

8) I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99, even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids' sizes. This is out of concern for my safety and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat, and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

9) I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell and begin to look like Vienna sausages.

10) I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes are as long as my fingers and no sandal makes creepy feet look good.

11) I will promise if I wear flip flops that I will ensure that they actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking. I will swear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.

12) I will promise to go to my local nail salon at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $25 and worth EVERY penny).

13) I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear... nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals.

Now go forth and wear some cute sandals! (Just remember to curl your toes at the end, JO!!!)

Quiverfull

So I read where the Duggars are expecting for, I think, the 18th time! If you haven't heard of Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar, go read about them here. DiscoveryHealth has done a couple of shows or series that brings us into their incredibly full and busy home. Talk about the Proverbs 31 woman! This lady makes me sick, but she's such a graceful, peaceful, patient, happy mom, you just can't not like her! (But can we all take up a collection to work on her hair-do? Seriously, the feathered hair over her ears sends me into spastic fits every time I see it! Flashbacks to my old middle school mullet...)

They are apparently a very religious Quiverfull family. "Quiver-wha?? What are you talking about, GGG???" Thanks for asking! As luck would have it, we've got a resident expert to explain the ideas and beliefs of just such a family in our friend, Raising Arrows. As some of you may remember, she has been graciously documenting her journey through the loss of her sweet baby, Emmy. Sidebar: she has recently learned that they are pregnant again and will once again have arms full of a bundle of joy around Christmastime.

Anyhoo, I don't have any real profound reason for blogging about this other than this:

1) I am fascinated at marriages where husbands and wives are so on the same page of music (really, about any topic, not just kids or religion). That is something I take away from reading about these families.

2) I secretly wonder what condition these women are in after having, literally, dozens of children.

3) I long to have more children myself but wonder about the logistics of that, considering different aspects of my particular situation.

4) As any other parent, I often question my own parenting skills. There are many aspects of it about which I'm confident and resolute; however, the couple of areas that niggle away at me do a real number on my overall confidence. As most of you have probably gathered, I am extremely hard on myself (for no apparent reason) and therefore these weak areas are constant sources of stress for me.

5) I wonder what Jim Bob and Michelle's relationship is really like. It seems very close, especially despite the fact that they have so many kids and their needs competing for their attention. I wonder if either one has struggled with infidelity. It doesn't seem like it would even be possible; however, it seems like that's when it always happens, right??

6) Lastly,... I wanna be a Duggar!! They just all look so darn cute and happy!!

"My Soul Wells Up With Hallelujahs..."

Just saw this over at S4J's page. It's by far one (of many) of my favorite Chris Rice songs. So, watch this lovely video and read the description that the El-shaddai Himself gives of the magnitude of His creations and His knowledge in Job 38:1-42:6...

Dearest Tom...

Dearest Tom,

I don't why I feel compelled to write to you tonight, but I do. R. just came out for a weekend visit and returned home tonight. The kids and I had a great visit with him, and it means a lot to the kids that he made a special trip out here just to spend time with them.

It's so weird. I understand and oftentimes accept the thought of moving on for myself. It has been a different story for the kids. Most days are pretty routine for them, but some days or moments strike their hearts and they long for you. (In that respect, all three of us are a lot alike.) Then they, too, meet R. and fall in love. They still (and always will) call you and know you as, "Daddy," but the love and admiration in their hearts for him just makes my heart ache. Sam thrives on his approval and masculinity. Grace curls up in his arms and unabashedly lays her heart in his strong hands, just the way she used to do with you. It breaks my heart that you're not here to experience this, but it uplifts me to see how God has provided fatherly love for our kids.

How is it possible to love and to mourn simultaneously? To move forward and yet bring part of the past along with you? To yearn for the love torn so quickly out of our grasp, yet not desire for anything to be different, lest the precious new love be lost forever?

This is where I live -- in a garden of vibrant colors under a veil of thick, grey fog. There are more and more moments where the fog breaks long enough to reveal colors so intense and beautiful that it almost hurts my eyes to behold. It is the light of God's goodness and love shining down on His unimaginable blessings that I know I'm experiencing, that I thought I'd never experience again after that fleeting moment in which you were gone. That fog turned the colors of my landscape to shades of grey. It is only now, two and a half years later, that those colors have returned...

...I am so blessed and so lucky to have found you both. I just can't wait to tell you all about it someday. But, then again, I bet you already know...