Don't Be Such A Titmouse!

He he he, the "Beavis" in me just has to come out every now and then...

I have discovered, after working in the front yard this morning, that we have yet more birds nesting with us! This family must be really well-to-do if the height of their penthouse view is any indicator. Also, the exclusivity of the front porch is a strong argument, as there are almost no other places that could possibly house any nests. Luke and Laura Titmouse (I can't quite discern what specific breed they are, but they are tufted like a titmouse, although their beaks are longer and their coloration is mainly grey) obviously like to entertain. They have wild, swinging parties at the birdbath below their nest, as evidenced by the birds swooping and bathing around my front porch and flowerbed.



John and Marsha watched cautiously from a distance today as the kids and I planted our garden this morning. I think they understand that we're not going to mess with them, but John is still keeping a watchful eye on us, telling Marsha to just "calm down, he's got everything under control!"

Rex and Chyna were nowhere to be found, undoubtedly sleeping off last night's partying or something. Their crazy, unkempt nest has huge twigs and long strands of St. Augustine runners hanging down. They are starting to be a blight on the neighborhood, and I, as the President of the Birdie Homeowner's Association, may have to issue a citation for them to maintain their home a little better.

We're Expecting!

HAHAHA!!! Gotcha!! Bet you thought something serious was going down here at the hacienda... Good grief, what kind of girl do you think I am?!?

No, really, new life is always something to rejoice about at my house. I remember last summer when we had some rather snitty Mockingbird parents that were highly offended that we chose to use our inflatable pool in the backyard (heaven forbid) because it came within a country mile of their nest. I don't remember if we actually saw the babies in the nest, but I do remember a plump youngster who was probably the last of his graduating class to learn how to fly. He hung out on our backporch for the better part of a day or two. I wanted so desperately to put him back in the nest so he could have a "do-over," but I knew that if I touched him and he had my scent, the mother would have nothing to do with him. (Women can be so testy...)

This year the birds have gotten smart. They have upgraded from nesting in our vertical twigs young trees and are now nesting in tiny box-like places at the top of some brick columns where the roof goes over the porch. Whomever said that animals were dumb obviously didn't know birds. These nests are completely inaccessible to any land-locked creature. The only possible intruders to these penthouses are other birds (highly unlikely), nosy homeowners (such as yours truly), and the occasional bug or spider. Most of my spiders are gargantuan and terrifying big enough and predatory enough that they prefer to be on the ground or along the walls near where the bugs hang out. Their cozy little nests stay dry and warm in the unpredictable Central Texas spring weather.

After careful searching, I have discerned that we are awaiting five baby finches, Cannin's Finches to be exact. The parents look like a scrappy sort, but they have the most amazing song! It sort of reminds me of how judgmental we can be of the way people look, especially those claiming to be musicians. Then they go and open their mouths or pick up an instrument and everyone's jaws drop and we all stand there, astounded that such amazing things just came out of something that looks like that!

But I digress. It really touched my heart today, looking out my kitchen window at John and Marsha Finch (hey, they've become part of my everyday interactions -- they're completely personified to me already). Marsha sits dutifully on her eggs all.day.long. You know her birdie butt's gotta be tired. And while John gets to flit and flut all over the neighborhood, hanging out with his birdie buddies, I watched him come back to her and "feed her" some lunch, Chinese takeout and watermelon or some such pregnancy combo, I'm sure. As I stood there watching him take such sweet care of his mate, I must've moved or something because John caught me voyeurizing his loving display, and he copped a 'tude about it! He was immediately defensive of Marsha, and he turned around, moving his head this way and that, trying to size me up, thinking, "I could take her! She may be 500 times my size, but I could whip her ass!" It was so awesome.

And I guess there's a housing boom in the bird community as well, because I noticed today that John and Marsha now have neighbors. Rex and Chyna Mockingbird have moved in two columns down, and they are some gnarly thrashers from what I can tell. They are the obnoxious, punk rock neighbors -- their nest is being constructed of these massive twigs that won't even fit down in the box-like area, and they have thorns all over them because they are from some mesquite trees! Man! Poor Chyna's gonna have some serious hemorhhoid action from warming those puppies... And heaven forbid they use the other two nests from last year that I left up in the trees that were previously occupied by the other mockingbird families. Guess everyone wants a new ride these days...

Keeping up with the "Joneses" is a nice distraction from everything else going on these days. Hopefully the cigars will be coming out soon for John and Marsha! I'll keep you posted!

Grr and Ick

**DISCLAIMER: I am in a FOUL mood. Don't read this if you can't handle some serious kvetching. I apologize in advance for being negative, but I needed some vent time...

You know, this blogspot thing unfortunately says something about the duality of my nature. I have been having a pretty good, blessed, insightful day and then WHACK! Something has happened that has totally ruined my mood, sabotaged my thoughts, and cast me into a deep, dark funk. I can't even blog about it here, which only serves to upset me more. I go from this lovely post on something precious and spiritual to the funk-nasty sh*t going on in my heart. ICK!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't even describe to you the things running through my head right now because our language does not have words for how I'm feeling. I am completely powerless to unleash my words into cyberspace for fear that the party/parties involved might catch wind that something has set me off and I haven't seen fit to approach them about it. I can't always handle confrontation, at least, not in the heat of passion. I just had a discussion about this with someone last night. He thinks people should talk about things immediately while the emotions are still raw and exposed because that's how you truly feel about the issue. HOWEVER! I know what an idiot I am when I'm upset, and I don't ever want to explode at him or anyone else the way I have in the past. Trust me, I tell him, you WANT me to cool off and collect my thoughts! Can I get a witness?!?!?

...The "Grr" section has been deleted on purpose. Sorry if you missed it. I hit the delete button and didn't even copy/paste it into Word, so if you missed it, you missed it. Had to be done...

GRRR!!!

There are so many days when I read everyone else's posts and wonder why my life has to be so different from the norm, whatever I guess that is. Yes, I know that's a major pity party, but some days it just happens. I feel like I'm on the outside looking in at happy families. Moms and dads loving each other, caring for their kids, taking joy in the little things, having adventures, taking life by the horns. I look at my life and see that most days, but there are many days where I just don't see that. Things have come so far, I have so many blessings, but I feel like I'm walking down that hall in "Poltergeist" that keeps getting longer and longer the farther down it you go.

ICK!!! GRRR!!! GRRR!!! ICK!!!

Mandatum Novum

OK. I was going to give everyone their "Maundy Thursday 101" lesson, but Sing4Joy has totally beat me to the punch! So, go hit her page and come back so we can continue...

Pretty interesting stuff, I think. I've noticed that not many churches have Maundy Thursday services, and I know my church has not always had them. At my church, we are observing this important day with a Seder, combining that with the chance for each person to take part in the meal as well as music. It's not a traditional, orthodox seder, but then again, we're not Jewish. We are trying to incorporate our Jewish heritage to better appreciate and understand our New Testament faith.

One of the songs that we are playing tonight is, "In The Garden," by Michael Card. I have scoured the internet to find you a clip to hear or watch of this song. It is NOT the traditional hymn that you are most likely thinking of; it's a completely different song. It is a lament of sorts, and the part that gets to me is the second verse. Here are the lyrics:

"Trembling with fear,
Alone in the garden
Battle before the final war
Blood became tears,
There in the garden
To fall upon the silent stone
There in the darkness, the Light
And the darkness stood still
Two choices, one tortured will
And there, once the choice had been made
All the world could be saved
By the One in the garden

The light of the dawn
Was seen in the garden
By gentle eyes, so sadly wise
The angels appear,
They come to the garden
Clothed with sighs, they realize
The One they've adored from the start
Will be broken apart
By the ones He had come to save
So they're here simply now to be near
He's no longer alone
They sit by Him and moan."

I have never viewed the Passion from the perspective of the angels, created beings separate from humans and from God, spectators in the history of creation. How they have adored Jesus, the Word made flesh, which has been since the foundations of the world, and ministered to Him no doubt, have worshipped Him and will do so again at the end of days. I envision Jesus, wracked with the reality that is so near. His aching, wrestling with what is to come, His desire to be obedient to the Father, His intercession for us as believers yet to come even moments before these terrible events begin (John 17:20-26), and yet there is an unseen assembly. The angels have come to minister to Him. They can't step into His place, but their ministry is one of presence. It was so important that He not suffer alone. They said nothing but they were there. Their spirits were so heavy, yet they came to Him.

Can we 100% prove that this actually happened? No. But is there exacting evidence that proves that this was impossible? Again, no. It seems acceptable in my understanding that this scenario is entirely possible, and it grieves me in a beautiful way to think of the Passion from this perspective. Thinking of the feelings running through Jesus' heart, the reason for all this to come to pass, break my heart. Then, when I think about the angels coming to minister to Him, their hearts breaking, that, too, makes me sad but comforts me as well. I can believe that, if the Father provided this kind of comfort to Jesus in His time of need, then He can also accomplish that in my life. The angels came to provide love and support, not to take the cup of suffering away. And so it is in our lives. God comes to us -- supernaturally, through other people, through experiences, etc. -- and shows us His ministry of presence, although we're still up to our eyeballs in some of the thickest mud we've ever found ourselves in. It is a big deal to me to not feel alone in my struggles and my journeys. When I feel alone in this world, I know that I have not been completely abandoned, and that thought alone has been something that has gotten me through many a hard day.

One last thought about the events of today: try to bring Maunday Thursday and Good Friday to the table with you every time you receive communion. As I like to tell Ron, communion, along with baptism, are two of the only things in my religion that are tangible. You can have a sensory experience with bread, wine, and water. They are, to me, one of the easiest ways to remind me of "what it's all about." It's about love. Jesus loved me, even me. He established the breaking of the bread and the drinking of the wine as simple, physical reminders of His love. He suffered, was broken, and poured out His life out of love. For me. For you.

"Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." --John 15:13 (KJV)

Heavenly Angels In Need

As I sit here screaming at Sam to quit stealing food out of the kitchen (read: candy), and praying not to be swept away by tornadoes today (it's a typical spring day in Central Texas), I am catching up on my blogs. I noticed that Raising Arrows has a couple of new posts, and what I saw on there was so amazing that I must put a special link on my blog today.

Long, painful story made short, this woman lost her 7 month old daughter several months ago (less than a year, but I forget how long ago). She has beautifully chronicled what is churning in her heart about her sweet Emmy, as well as how her hubby and Emmy's siblings are progressing through the days and months since losing Emmy. It's a hard blog for me to read, but she is such a strong, beautiful woman that she blesses me every time I hit her page. Anyhoo, the cool thing I found today was the memory box she received from an organization called Heavenly Angels In Need. Please take a minute to check out this non-profit organization. If you are looking for a worthwhile place to consider for making a charitable donation, if you have baby items you can donate, or even if you want to contribute your wedding gown to make burial clothes for infants, please keep these people in mind. They provide all sorts of help and materials to families grieving the loss of infants at no charge.

"Erin Go Bra(ugh)-less"

I have never laughed so hard in my life. I really don't have anything profound to say, but I have GOT TO GOT TO GOT TO introduce you all to a blog I read. I think this girl could seriously have a career writing for sitcoms or something, or possibly be a stand-up comedian. Click on the title of this blog and prepare to pee your pants -- she's HYSTERICAL! If you're having a bad day or just need to laugh out loud, you need to bookmark her site...

Erin Go Braugh!

St. Patrick's Breastplate

I bind unto myself today
The strong name of the Trinity,
By invocation of the same,
The Three in One, and One in Three.

I bind this day to me for ever,
By power of faith, Christ's incarnation;
His baptism in the Jordan River;
His death on the cross for my salvation.
His bursting from the spiced tomb;
His riding up the heav'nly way;
His coming at the day of doom;
I bind unto myself today.

I bind unto myself today
The power of God to hold and lead,
His eye to watch, His might to stay,
His ear to harken to my need;
The wisdom of my God to teach,
His hand to guide, His shield to ward,
The word of God to give me speech,
His heav'nly host to be my guard.

Against all Satan's spells and wiles,
Against false words of heresy,
Against the knowledge that defiles,
Against the heart's idolatry,
Against the wizard's evil craft,
Against the death-wound and the burning,
The choking wave, the poison'd shaft,
Protect me, Christ, till thy returning.

Christ be with me, Christ within me,
Christ behind me, Christ before me,
Christ beside me, Christ to win me,
Christ to comfort and restore me,
Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
Christ in quiet, Christ in danger,
Christ in hearts of all that love me,
Christ in mouth of friend and stranger.

I bind unto myself the name,
The strong name of the Trinity,
By invocation of the same,
The Three in One, and One in Three,
Of whom all nature hath creation,
Eternal Father, Spirit Word.
Praise to the Lord of my salvation:
Salvation is of Christ the Lord.